No matter who the guy or girl is, no matter how long you have been with them or had a major crush on for or how popular they are, don’t feel like saying yes to having sex it something you have to do.
If you are not ready and it is not something that you want to do than say no, because in 2, 3 or 5 years from now you may regret not sticking with your instincts.
If your reasons for saying yes are because you are worried that the person you are with will lose all sense of interest in you than they are simply not worth your time, chances are you are being used for sex and soon enough you will end up hating them.
Everybody’s first time experience is very different, so if one of your friends have already experienced having sex don’t think that it is how your first time will be.
What I believe determines how your first time will be are a few things, like how much you actually like the person? How well they treat you? Whether you are being used for sex? The list goes on.
If you don’t want your first time to be unenjoyable you should make sure you are doing it for the right reasons because you may feel it is fine at the time but you may soon realise after that it was a big mistake.
Try not to let your friends make you feel like it’s something you have to do to fit in,
Everyone experiences life at their own pace and not being at the same pace as your friend’s, doesn’t make you any less mature or cooler than they are, if this isn’t something you have realised already you will in years to come especially when you leave school and go your separate ways.
The person you are with may also put pressure on you to have sex, if you hear them saying things like “If you really like/love me……” or “Can I/you just go in for a second” etc. things like this are normally just said to get what they want.
You can convince yourself they really care about you but they wouldn’t put any pressure on you to have sex or do anything you are not ready if they did.
If you decide you are ready to go as far as having sex, there are some important things you should think about like, contraception because whether it is your first or 100th time you can defiantly fall pregnant.
Is this the person you want to be the person you experience this with?
Personally I think it is much better experienced with someone you love it is a different feeling all together.
If you still think you are ready and you have made your mind up than I wish you all the luck and I hope your first time can be a special and memorable time.
After reading a blog yesterday ( http://ryanepps.org/2009/09/04/304/) I noticed an interesting point of view was made, that parents impact on their child’s decision to lose their virginity?
Although I believe this has some truth and parents do have some impact on their child’s decision of when to lose their virginity I also believe children no matter what age, have a mind of their own.
what you hear from their parents sadly sometimes goes in one ear and out the other, Parents are not always right but try and be mindful of what they say even if you do not agree think about it, remember they have been through this before and may have some helpful point of views.
Stay tuned for my next post.
If you are not ready and it is not something that you want to do than say no, because in 2, 3 or 5 years from now you may regret not sticking with your instincts.
If your reasons for saying yes are because you are worried that the person you are with will lose all sense of interest in you than they are simply not worth your time, chances are you are being used for sex and soon enough you will end up hating them.
Everybody’s first time experience is very different, so if one of your friends have already experienced having sex don’t think that it is how your first time will be.
What I believe determines how your first time will be are a few things, like how much you actually like the person? How well they treat you? Whether you are being used for sex? The list goes on.
If you don’t want your first time to be unenjoyable you should make sure you are doing it for the right reasons because you may feel it is fine at the time but you may soon realise after that it was a big mistake.
Try not to let your friends make you feel like it’s something you have to do to fit in,
Everyone experiences life at their own pace and not being at the same pace as your friend’s, doesn’t make you any less mature or cooler than they are, if this isn’t something you have realised already you will in years to come especially when you leave school and go your separate ways.
The person you are with may also put pressure on you to have sex, if you hear them saying things like “If you really like/love me……” or “Can I/you just go in for a second” etc. things like this are normally just said to get what they want.
You can convince yourself they really care about you but they wouldn’t put any pressure on you to have sex or do anything you are not ready if they did.
If you decide you are ready to go as far as having sex, there are some important things you should think about like, contraception because whether it is your first or 100th time you can defiantly fall pregnant.
Is this the person you want to be the person you experience this with?
Personally I think it is much better experienced with someone you love it is a different feeling all together.
If you still think you are ready and you have made your mind up than I wish you all the luck and I hope your first time can be a special and memorable time.
After reading a blog yesterday ( http://ryanepps.org/2009/09/04/304/) I noticed an interesting point of view was made, that parents impact on their child’s decision to lose their virginity?
Although I believe this has some truth and parents do have some impact on their child’s decision of when to lose their virginity I also believe children no matter what age, have a mind of their own.
what you hear from their parents sadly sometimes goes in one ear and out the other, Parents are not always right but try and be mindful of what they say even if you do not agree think about it, remember they have been through this before and may have some helpful point of views.
Stay tuned for my next post.
I just wanted to say, i think this blog is fantastic. It gives an honest, down to earth opinion on current teen issues aswell as realistic advice to help teens through problems they may be having that they dont feel they can talk to anyone about. Thank you Hayley and keep up the great work. this blog entry helped me and i feel it will help alot of other teens too!
ReplyDeleteTara
Thaks Tara,
ReplyDeleteThat is great to hear, I am glad I have managed to help at least one teen out there, if you ever have any questions please feel free to ask!
Thanks alot for this information Hayley. I think the way you've explained how guys and girls should go about treating their virginity is healthy and most of all smart and safe. Keep up the great advice.
ReplyDeleteJack.
Thanks Jack it it good to hear what a guy thinks. Stay tuned for more.
ReplyDeletegood blog and good advice, people shoudlnt feel they need to lose thir verginity just for the sake of it cos their friends ahve, do it in good time and when the moment is right i say, even if that means its not with a partner, if the times right the time is right!
ReplyDeleteyour right it should be your choice and no body else's.
ReplyDeleteThanks for the comment